As I’ve been spending a day waiting to hear back from publishers and agents, filled with both hope and sorrow, for some reason I started listening to my jazz recordings. Coltrane, the Gilbertos, Wes Montgomery, Dorothy Ashby. I’ve had my ups and downs over the years, especially in the great silences while authors await news on their submissions. Then something came to me. Who’s approval was I really looking for? Did it matter at all? My writing is for an audience, but shouldn’t it be first as a primary healing act? Do I need approval? I try my absolute best in all I do to be kind, and searching. I give so much, sometimes with no return, and in this internet age, which can be so uncaring.
I’ve been completely honest on this blog. All my hopes and dreams are here if you care to look, my truth and deepest hopes and fears are here. All it takes is listening, and if you’re a publisher looking at my work for the fist time, I welcome you. I may not have the approval of everyone at all times, but I’m cool with that. That’s just the way things can be sometimes.
I’m heading to a dreaming state here at the end of the day. With all the hate and fear we sometimes experience as artists, we still put our work out there, selflessly, if you’re not in the gallery system as I am. Jazz, the voice of the modern world, the birth of so many movements, are here in this playlist I made. I hope it brings you as much solace as it has for me. Take good care, stay safe, and be kind in all you do. Just the tiniest things can have lasting effects. We all make mistakes, but they can always be set on the right path again. Wishing everyone renewal, peace and thoughtfulness this weekend.